A feelings chart for kids: what am I feeling?

Say feelings out loud as they happen, yours included: “I'm cross because we're late.” Stories help too: stop on a page and ask how the character feels, and how they can tell (the American Academy of Pediatrics suggests bedtime stories for this). And give your child a face to point to when the word won't come, which is what a feelings chart is for.

For most children, yes. The American Academy of Pediatrics says tantrums happen most between ages 1 and 3. Finding the words for a feeling, and calming it down, comes slowly, with practice and with us. If big feelings often end in someone getting hurt, last for weeks, or keep your child from school or play, talk to your pediatrician: see When to ask for help.

Pictures of faces that each show one feeling, so a child who can't find the word can point instead. Ours are Foo's own faces from the book Foo's Big Emotions, and children who know the story know what each face went through.

A small moment, once a day, when your child points to or says how they feel. At home, bedtime works well. In a classroom, many teachers do it in the morning. There is no right answer and nothing to fix: you listen, and say it back.

A scale for how big a feeling is, not which feeling it is. Ours is five clouds, from a little white cloud to Foo's big dark one. It works as an anger thermometer too, and for worry or sadness. A small cloud can be talked about; a big one needs a calm-down first.

The feelings wheels most people know were made for grown-ups and hold dozens of words. For little ones we made a simple one with eight of Foo's faces and an arrow to turn. It's free to print with the other sheets on this page. It's new, so we're still learning how families use it.

Anger is a normal feeling, and it's on the chart for a reason. Talk to your pediatrician, family doctor or school counselor if angry outbursts often end in someone getting hurt, last for weeks, or keep your child from school or play. The American Academy of Pediatrics says to check with your pediatrician when a child seems unusually aggressive for longer than a few weeks. More in When to ask for help.

Thank them for telling you, and ask what the worry is about, without rushing to fix it. A slow breath together or a safe person close by can help some children feel calmer. Our breathing exercises are a gentle start. If worries last for weeks, or keep your child from school or play, please talk to your pediatrician or school counselor: see When to ask for help.